Observing

When an introvert spends her entire week off  from her day job giving and giving and giving and giving bad things can occur.  It all seemed so logical when I said yes.  I said yes to three luncheons, I said yes to subbing a gazillion classes, I said yes to extra stimuli.  It is one thing to go to IKEA when you introvert tank is full, it is another to do so when you are completely depleted.  Add in a noisy peanut infested, babies crying steak house and it is a wonder this gal did not end up on the news.

All kidding aside, it is a remarkable moment for me to be the observer of my madness.

Maybe it is my yoga training or maybe it is the integration of meditation, journaling, and a yoga practice that has offered me this beautiful gift of observing.

As I was walking this morning, I was feeling myself on the verge of tears.  Walking, I recalled all of the energy sucking events–while ALL beautiful–of my week.  I also noted that the week did not include a single walk in nature or time alone that was off my mat which are typical ways that I find myself. Rather, it was a week of constant output. Not once did I refuel my tank the way that I know how to.

The tears never fell as I walked this morning, instead I marveled at my ability to observe.  In that observation I was able to step away from the feelings of sadness and take in all the beauty of my life. The love.  The opportunity. The sharing of my life.

And I found great and  magnificent solace on my mat this afternoon and while sinking into a glorious bubble bath.  I am refueled and oh, so content.

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