Limitless

Ahhh….with a new year comes a sense of spaciousness that awaits.  For some it is about resolutions, or as one of my greatest teachers once said a resolution is simply a premeditated disappointment.  We have all been there–the vow to lose weight, or save money, or leave the crappy job, or find the perfect mate–only to be greatly let down when a few months into the year those desires seem to fade, or at the least the effort it takes to get the desires diminishes.

I get it.

We set goals, and we often get tired or frustrated because we live in an instant world and we should all know by now that some of the things we typically make resolutions around take time.  Yep, they take time.  And time means we have to be diligent and patient.  Sounds like a bunch of let downs, doesn’t it?

This year I spent way too much time thinking of a word or a vision for my upcoming year.  Rather than get into my heart space, I was consumed in my head with thoughts and ideas. I had a direction I thought I might want to take my year and my life, but neither of the two words that I had in my mind seemed to really hit me in the gut.

And just like that, I was sitting around minding my own business, NOT thinking about a word or a vision and it struck me.  And I mean, STRUCK me.  I felt it in my heart.

LIMITLESS. As defined, it is without end, limit or boundary; vast, infinite. Ahhh, yes.

As I spent the last week contemplating all the ways that I flourished last year, I was in awe of the magic in my life.  From the booming of my business, the falling into place of my personal life, the welcoming of a new life as a grandmother (what??) and the fullness of my bounty , I am in deep gratitude for all that I have created in my life.

Of course there are still really hard days.  There is still the reality of having a child who requires supervision all. the. time. And there is the bigger picture of that puzzle that I can worry about from time to time. There are still days of pain and discomfort.  And as part of being human, there are thoughts of lack or limits.  It just is.  I no longer deny those things but rather embrace them as part of the paradox of life.

As I look into the blank pages of 2019, I take in a deep breath.  I welcome the emptiness and vastness that awaits.  I feel hope with the open fields that are there for me to begin to walk into. I am ready.

 

Breaking Cycles

Part of the unfolding of my life has been removing the barriers and the layers of unneccessary beliefs and stories that I had made up about myself. It has also been deciding that enough is enough and then committing to change. Part of those changes have been breaking cycles of dysfunction not only to better myself, but to also be an example, especially to my kids.

Becoming a young mom required me to become selfless at a really young age.  As much as I treasured having three little humans to care for and love, it was not until I was about thirty-five that I began to give to myself as much as I gave to them. I am not sure that even if  I had the do-over I would change anything. Of course it would have been possible to give to both them and myself, but the wake up that I had in my mid-thirties was absolutely perfect as it was.

The process of waking up was the beginning of me taking back my power–grabbing back the light that I truly am and stoking the flame with goodness.  I found my soul purpose work, I reclaimed my physical health, I took hold of my inherent love and began to blossom into who I am today.

The cycle of self-loathing and self-destructive behaviors ended and with complete affirmation–I decided that there would be no more.  I took back my health, my emotions, my dreams and my mojo.

It struck me the other day that there is another cycle that I have the power to break.

Here is what it has looked like in my family–live and die fairly financially strapped.  Perhaps living month to month with no real financial future like retirement funds, second homes, investments.  Except for my father who died very wealthy but chose to not inherit any of the funds to myself or my kids, my family has been very “middle class”.  Personally, I have never experienced a windfall–no big settlements from a divorce, not one alimony check (it was rare to even get child support), money from a wealthy relative, no big real estate wins….nada.  Sadly, my children’s father died incredibly broke and had chosen to not have life insurance, so he left my kids with nothing but heartache. And so the cycle was continued for them.

But I have the power to change that.

I realized the other morning that just as I have changed old beliefs and pattens and then created an amazing life, I also have the power to do the same with money for my kids. It hit me that everything that I have achieved has been my own doing from decades of really hard work, and that although I have demonstrated great work-ethic to my kids, I have the power to change their lives.  They learned how to work and be self-sufficient, they learned how to budget and live within their means, they have eaten ramen for weeks on end in order to pay rent.

But what would happen if they were given something I have never been given?  What if they had help buying their first home? What if their dreams could come true with the gift of financial freedom? What if they had the financial security that I never had?

I have the power to change their lives.

I have the power to break the cycle of financial dysfunction.

I have the power to leave not just a legacy, but also security.

I have the power. Say that out loud a few times and just watch what happens to your confidence.

 

 

 

 

 

My Label

When I am asked what I do for a living, I usually hesitate.  I can’t stand labels that may be who I am–yoga teacher, Silver doTERRA leader, pilates instructor, Wellness Coach and more.  Yes, those labels validate my education and my hard work and I get that, but I want to be seen as just as I am. Just me.  Not defined by my title at work, but instead the difference that I make in the world. 
So, in my own effort to diminish a sense of separation from those who love yoga but do not teach it, or those who may not be a certain rank, or those who love wellness but choose to practice it and not teach it, I have declared my own label. (since it seems our world likes labels). 

My view

My view of the pleasure in my life.